12 Habits Restaurant Waiters Can’t Stand

When you don’t want to cook, there’s always takeout. But when there’s a special occasion, it’s fun to go out to a restaurant. On average, Americans dine at restaurants three times per month. Restaurants offer convenience, quality food, and time to socialize. As fun as it is for customers to be on the receiving end of restaurant service, the employees will tell you it’s not an easy job. Servers are on their feet for hours at a time, carry hot and heavy plates, and deal with rude customers. When you go to a restaurant, do your best to make your server’s job a little easier. Here are some habits that annoy waiters so you know for next time.

Seating Yourself

Every restaurant is different, and some have signs that say “seat yourself.” But this isn’t always the case. It’s protocol to wait for the host or hostess to seat you at the appropriate table—especially if there’s a long wait. When you seat yourself, you might choose a table that’s larger than your needs, such as a table that seats four for a party of two. One habit that really annoys servers, however, is seating yourself at a dirty table. The host will let you know when your table’s ready—one that’s clean and just the right size.

Touching Them Without Permission

No one likes to be touched by strangers, including your server. If your server is walking by, don’t grab them by the arm to stop them. Your server will introduce themselves by telling you their name, and this is how they’d like you to get their attention, if needed. That, a simple “excuse me”, or lowkey wave will do.

Asking Another Server for Something

Depending on the restaurant, you may have one server throughout your visit. At others, multiple servers may tend to all tables. Large chain restaurants tend to divide the tables into sections, which means you typically have one primary server. This is also who gets the bulk of the tip you leave. When you ask another server for something, you could be distracting them from their tables, and they won’t get tipped for the service they provide to you. Instead, if you really need something, ask that server to get your server.

Holding Up Your Glass to Signal Refills

What are you supposed to do when you would like a refill, but your server is taking orders at other tables? Holding up your empty glass to gesture at them isn’t the best call. Wait for your server to finish up with other guests. They usually check on you every few minutes or so, but if they haven’t made their rounds, you can give a friendly wave as they walk by.

Expecting Lunch or Happy Hour Prices After It’s Over

Many places have separate lunch or happy hour menus to drive traffic to the business during off-peak hours. Once those hours have ended, so do those special deals. Your server could get in trouble for giving you a discount during peak hours, so if you want those lunch or happy hour prices, go during those times.

Asking Them to Make Multiple Trips

Your server isn’t just your server—they usually have a whole section with multiple tables to tend to. So you can imagine how many steps they take in a single shift. One way to make your server’s life easier is to lump your requests together rather than keep them running around. If you need a refill, a side of ketchup, and the check, ask for them all at once instead of one thing at a time.

Making Too Many Substitutions

Whether you have food allergies, dietary restrictions, or just preferences, it’s OK to ask for one or two changes to your order. But any more than that and things get complicated. Servers have a lot on their mind, and it’s unrealistic to expect them to remember a lot of modifications. It could also burden the chefs in the kitchen, who are used to making each dish a certain way. If you need to heavily modify a dish, maybe it’s not the one for you. Take another look at the menu for something that meets your needs without (too much) modification.

Hanging Out After You’ve Eaten

At the end of the day, restaurants are businesses that rely on getting hungry diners in and out. When you stay for a long period of time, the restaurant—and servers—could lose out on money from using that table to feed more customers. Servers may also have to wait longer to close out your tab in order to get their tip. If you take too long, they may have to clock out and leave before they’ve been tipped.

Telling Them to Smile

“Service with a smile” has a nice ring to it, but holding a smile isn’t part of the job description. To see a friendly face, treat your server with respect and courtesy. Say “please” when you ask for something, “thank you” when your meal is served, and “have a nice day” when you leave. It also goes a long way if you order quickly and efficiently, and tidy up your table at the end of your meal. Essentially, give your server something to smile about rather than expecting it.

Asking for Separate Checks for a Large Party

Ever gone to a birthday dinner with a dozen or more guests? Servers know that large parties are a lot of work, but there’s one part that can really slow them down—requesting separate checks at the end of the meal. If you know you’ll want to split the bill multiple ways, let your server know at the very beginning so they can have different tabs going. It may not sound like much to divide a party of 14 into seven checks, but then they have to divide up the group order seven ways, collect seven cards, run them, and return them.

Skimping Out on a Tip

There are certain professions that expect tips, and servers are at the top of that list. In some places, servers make an hourly wage that’s below the legal minimum because they’re expected to earn additional income via tips. So, tip your servers because their livelihood could depend on it. The general rule of thumb is to tip at least 15 to 20 percent of your bill, though you can always tip more on exceptional service. What about tipping on takeout orders? Tipping is never required, but it’s a nice thing to do to show appreciation for those who made and packed your meal.

Arriving Just Before Closing

If you’ve been to a restaurant, you know it takes more than 15 minutes from the time you’re seated to the time you pay and leave. Oftentimes, it takes even longer than that. This is why servers prefer guests to arrive with ample time to spare before closing. Just because an establishment is open until 10 PM, doesn’t mean you have until then to walk through the front doors. Leave at least 30 minutes of wiggle room, but ideally an hour or longer out of respect for the employees who need to start their closing duties at closing time.